Sunday 11 November 2012

The rain and a rut

 

The rain came over the weekend and so did my mood. I feel like I am stuck in a rut, doing the same thing over and over again and taking everyone along with my foulness. I need a change, or a challenge or something exciting to happen (not sure what sort of exciting but it always sounds so exotic and interesting).

I know I am dealing with enough to fill my days and my time, but I want to do something different and to stay awake at night with a purpose and an outlet. And maybe to feel like I have achieved something... I know I am achieving something in raising three boys to be the best people they can be, but maybe some sort of achievement that's about me?

I don't know, my head is over thinking things and I know it needs to stop.

I think maybe today I will take a step back, take my time to do things and realise that I have all the time in the world to be with my boys and with myself. I am normally Ms Grateful and I think I am forgetting that with this mood. I am going to be slow today and hope to be more mindful. Then I'm hoping this mood will pass (which I know it will).

XXxxx

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